What If They Gave A Tea Party…

…and nobody came? Here’s more info from my favorite comedy site, Townhall.com.

Here’s the start of an interview by Hugh Hyberbole — I mean, Hugh Hewitt — with Newt Gingrich, the last sad white hope for the GOP:

HH: Over at www.newt.org, there is a headline that says heading toward a dictatorship? You don’t really believe that, do you, Mr. Speaker?

Watch out America, the GOP is mad as hell!

Lucky

Then there are times when you feel assured, the wind is warm and you’re surrounded by a panopoly of stunning women under the bloody red sun of fantastic LA…

American Gun Massacre 2009!

The bullets keep flying and the children keep dying:

SANTA CLARA, Calif. – Six people were shot to death, at least three of them children, and another person was critically wounded in an apparent murder-suicide at an upscale home in Silicon Valley, police said Monday. The suspect appeared to be among the dead in the apparent “family on family” violence, Lt. Phil Cooke said.

Maurice Jarre RIP

Another giant gone. There would almost not be a film were it not for the majestic music in this incredible scene.

If only they had been armed.

The wonders of the second-amendment continue to plant seeds:

CARTHAGE, N.C. – A gunman burst into a North Carolina nursing home Sunday morning and started “shooting everything,” killing seven residents and a nurse and wounding at least three others.

Robert Stewart, 45, of Moore County, was charged hours later with eight counts of first-degree murder and a single charge of felony assault of a law enforcement officer. Authorities offered few other details, allowing only that Stewart was not a patient or an employee at the nursing home, and isn’t believe to be related to any of the victims.

March Madness

Give me a break:

Derek Copp was unarmed when a deputy shot him in the chest at his off-campus apartment more than two weeks ago. West Michigan Enforcement Team officers entered the residence on a search warrant.

That deputy remains on paid leave while the Michigan State Police investigate the shooting. The shooting spurred several student protests, which students said were in response to both a lack of information from authorities regarding the incident as well as drug policies in general.

Copp’s attorney has said “a few tablespoonfuls” of marijuana were found in the apartment.

Worst. Godzilla. Moment. Ever.

I know many consider the Godzilla Flying By Radioactive Breath scene from the otherwise amazing GODZILLA VS THE SMOG MONSTER (1971) the single most ridiculous moment in any of the series, but really, nothing tops this bizarro moment from GODZILLA VS GIGAN (1972) where Godzilla finally…SPEAKS!

Main Title Theatre: Faster, Pussycat! Kill! Kill! (1965)

To celebrate Friday, here’s unarguably one of the greatest intros in cinema history. GO!

Try Again, Mr. President

Although it is a sign of evolution that a sitting president actually answered a question often asked but rarely discussed, Obama’s glib answer was too easy, too obvious, and coinciding with Jim Webb’s prison reform, didn’t make sense. But Obama merely acknowledged the economic aspect of the question, not the other elements. And since AG Holder has been forcing the feds to stop raiding medical marijuana facilities, actions speak louder than words.

Still, Jack Cole, executive director of Law Enforcement Against Prohibition (LEAP), was not amused in the least:

“Despite the president’s flippant comments today, the grievous harms of marijuana prohibition are no laughing matter. Certainly, the 800,000 people arrested last year on marijuana charges find nothing funny about it, nor do the millions of Americans struggling in this sluggish economy. It would be an enormous economic stimulus if we stopped wasting so much money arresting and locking people up for nonviolent drug offenses and instead brought in new tax revenue from legal sales, just as we did when ended alcohol prohibition 75 years ago during the Great Depression.”

Here’s Obama’s real thoughts on decriminalization in 2004:

Major Matt Mason: The Movie

Apparently Tom Hanks reads my blog. Because once he saw my post about the 1960′s Major Matt Mason toy line, he leaped into action (without hiring me to write the script)…

Universal will develop “Major Matt Mason,” a live-action feature based on the vintage Mattel action figure. Pic will be developed as a star vehicle for Tom Hanks, and Graham Yost will write the script.

Playtone partners Hanks and Gary Goetzman will produce.

The toy line originated in 1966; Mason led an astronaut team that worked on the moon and lived in a space station. The toy was a hit in the buildup to the first manned moon mission. Mattel retired the line in the 1970s.

Total Sanity

Thank you Jim Webb:

Alarmed by prisons that are clogged with mentally ill people, drug users and other non-violent offenders while well-armed gangs and drug lords often go unpunished, Virginia Sen. Jim Webb will launch a wide-ranging and politically risky campaign today to overhaul the nation’s criminal justice system.

With nearly 2.4 million Americans now behind bars, Webb said, “our incarceration rate has exploded…. But at the same time we aren’t really solving the problems.”

With backing from senior Democratic senators and quiet encouragement from President Barack Obama, Webb will introduce legislation to create a bipartisan commission on criminal justice reform.

Webb said he wants the commission to educate itself and then the American public on some little-understood realities about crime and punishment.

His bill reads like an indictment of the current system, noting that the United States has the highest incarceration rate in the world, that minorities make up a disproportionately large share of prison populations, and that half of prisoners will return to prison within three years of release.

Webb said he hopes that once people begin to understand that such a high rate of imprisonment has done little to stop violent crime or drug trafficking, they’ll support changes.

Media Smackdown

Our lapdog press corps is so schizophrenic. They cowered and joked with Bush for six years, then got a little spunk after it was clear they enabled the Iraq War among other disasters. So I was happy to see CNN hack Ed Henry get his in the Obama press conference:

Eruption of Stupid

I sometimes think God is fucking with the GOP. Here’s wonderboy Bobby Jindal a few weeks ago, responding to Obama’s SOTU, trying to drum up some talk-radio style faux-populist rage:

While some of the projects in the bill make sense, their legislation is larded with wasteful spending. It includes … $140 million for something called “volcano monitoring.” Instead of monitoring volcanoes, what Congress should be monitoring is the eruption of spending in Washington, D.C.

And here’s actual reality from Sarah Palin’s state this week:

Alaska’s Mt. Redoubt Volcano, which had been in a tempestuous mood for two months, erupted Sunday night at 10:38 p.m., sending an ash cloud 50,000 feet above sea level and prompting several flight cancelations.

Minor Earth Major Sky

In honor of a-ha — yes, my favorite band — and their upcoming new release and world tour, here’s the title song from their 2000 release, a number one hit in 17 countries except in tone-deaf America, where people are still transfixed by “Take On Me”…

Armed And Dangerous America

Here’s an email I just received from the good folks over at the increasingly unhinged Townhall.com site. Don’t say I didn’t warn y’all:

Dear Reader,

The next four years may prove to be a turning point for all freedom loving Americans.

With the new administration holding party majorities in the House and Senate, we are facing the worst political environment for the passage of unchecked gun control legislation and further erosion of our constitutional right to bear arms than we have previously seen in our lifetimes.

As the nation creeps from recession to depression, the potential for civil unrest in every major city grows more likely. There has never been a more crucial time in our nation’s history to make sure you are armed and trained for the protection of yourself and your family.

One man in our country knows this better than most, and I’m proud to tell you, he is doing something about it.

Dr. Piazza, the Millionaire Patriot, wants YOU armed and trained and he is putting his money where his mouth is.

He is providing you with the opportunity to attend five days of world class training at his Front Sight Firearms Training Institute with everything you need to secure permits to carry a concealed handgun in over 30 states—all for pennies-on-the-dollar!

Plus, if you act quickly before all the guns he set aside are gone, he will give you, free of charge, a Springfield Armory XD Pistol in your choice of 9mm, .40SW, or .45ACP!